It's been awhile and I know I need to be on the next line, "Life is a duty, complete it" but I need to go back to "Life is a challenge".
Apparently it is damn near impossible for me to find a job because I am a mom. I have missed several opportunities of work because the hours doesn't work around my schedule with Izzy. If I were a selfish person I would ask her dad to change jobs so I could work the shifts that are offered to me. But I'm not, I've always let other people come before myself. I am not as important as everyone else around me. I'm at the bottom of the totem pole. That is my place in life and probably always will be.
And while we're on the subject of challenges, let me talk a minute about this weight loss. I am trying my best to do this on my own but I am too weak. A few weeks ago I had an opportunity to audition for The Biggest Loser and missed out on it because, again, I was worried about other people. I could send in a video, if I haven't missed the deadline. But have I got around to doing that? No. I need to change. I want to change. People say if you want something bad enough you will do what you can to get it. Apparently I'm the exception. I want things badly, so badly that it makes me cry. And yet still I haven't obtained those things.
Life craps on me everyday. And everyday I think tomorrow will be better. So I wait. And I wait. But tomorrow hasn't come yet.
