Life is a dream, realize it.

Life is a dream, realize it. This line is important to me. I'm a big fan of dreams. Night and day. I almost always have crazy, random, weird dreams at night. Lately I've had a little trouble remembering them I think because I'm always being jolted out of sleep by an alarm in the morning. But I really need to keep a notebook by the bed so I can write down what I remember. Some of these dreams would be a great start to a good book. And it is my dream to be a writer. I also daydream a lot. I imagine different scenarios of things I would like to happen. I suppose those would be a good way to start a book as well.

I have other dreams (goals) as well. I want to be a teacher, photographer, master crafter. Yes I have lots of dreams. The problem is that I haven't realized any of those dreams. I'm stuck in a rut. I'm at a place where I'm close to obtaining my goals but I can't seem to move forward any further. I'm letting things hold me back and I know I shouldn't. I usually get these burst of motivation and I start getting things figured out and I think I'm finally gonna get to where I want to be but then I'm usually stuck waiting for something. For example, I've started my application for UNC-Charlotte but I can't complete it at the moment. For some reason, even though I'm 26 and haven't lived with my parents for 5 years, the application asks for their information. So I'm waiting to get all that info together. Of course I'm only waiting because of my own procrastination. But I know once I get the application done I will again have to wait until I have the money for the application fee. I'm not sure what it is now but I'm guessing more than $50 since that's what it was a few years ago when I was going to apply. I don't why I let something as simple as applying to college get me overwhelmed. But that's just how I am. Always sweating the small stuff.

When I was younger and dreaming about what I wanted for my life, I never dreamed I would be where I am now: 26 years old, out of high school for 9 years and all I have to show for it is an AA degree and no job. I guess the only dream I have realized is having a child. But even that isn't exactly what I expected. I always said I wanted 3 or 4 kids and I didn't want a huge age gap. But my kid is 5 years (and 3 months) old and I don't see any babies in my immediate future. I still want more kids, I just can't justify having one right now , with the state of my relationship. Plus, there's some things about myself that I need to work on.

So, if you're a young person reading this, learn from my mistakes. Don't put anything off. If you have dreams, follow them. Don't stop until you reach your goal. And even then, keep going. Update your goal. Always strive for something. It'll make life worth living. You will get discouraged, maybe many times. But keep going, you will get there if you keep trying.